Notes to my 15 year old self: Listen to the Silence

Have you heard silence yet? Its been the single biggest transformation in my life - appreciation of silence. I have always been the quieter one, so the love affair started earlier. Seeking calmer surroundings and people became such a big part of my life that I lost out on much of late night parties that young adults are synonymous with. Once in a while I did land up in a pub but my challenge with those nights was palpable to people who would accompany me. I would try hard to fit in, I would really try but fail miserably. Authenticity or the lack thereof is easy to catch and I would be red just cheating on myself. After 12 years of trying to fit in, at the ripe old age of 29, I felt comfortable declaring to my friends that loud places, people and stuff are not my thing and I would appreciate if they understood. The BORING tag was more pleasant to deal with than trying to groove to ear deafeningly loud music in a sweaty, dingy place. All the while wishing that I be on my couch with my favorite book. That's my truth and I am no longer insecure about it. 

But disliking loudness is not the same appreciating silence. Silence is deeper than as perceived in everyday life. Its not the lack of noise, its the space that houses noise. Its immensely powerful and therefore immensely intimidating. Most people numb themselves out with the Television ON the moment there is a lull in the day, or the radio, Facebook, twitter or just human conversations. Anything to cover up the space between the activities of the day. We are scared, scared to experience silence. Because we are inherently aware of the its potential and power. We are scared that it has the potential to teach us the deepest nuggets of life but its scary down there. and its true. Just spend 15 mins in silence and you will know the mayhem it can cause. Of course, silence for most of us is accompanied by deep thought. That's why meditation is kept at arms length by so many people. It all comes rushing down...Boom! Boom! Boom! The thoughts cause havoc. But that doesn't say as much about silence as it does about our thoughts. Its actually a completely revolutionary experience if we spend the 15 minutes actually seeing our thoughts. Silence gives us the space to do that exercise. 

Silence gives us the opportunity to feel our inner world. I love the magnificence of the simple but powerful exercise in Eckhart Tolle's Power of Now. He says "ask yourself, what am I feeling right now?" and then just hear. My personal experience is that my whole body feels alive as if every cell in my body is saying "I am present!". I believe with conviction that one can only appreciate the present moment when they have a deep appreciation for and awareness of silence. 

Silence lets our inner wisdom come through. Meditation is one such tool to welcome that silence to our daily lives. Because unless we can practice silence without getting terrorized by it, we will not be able to access the vast intelligence that is right behind the layer of thought chatter. 

Our inner world is spaciousness and silence, that is who we are. When we appreciate and seek it, it's nothing but a deep recognition of our very own silence. 

My urge to all young adults is to invite silence to your life early. Try and sit in silence for 5 minutes everyday, may be just appreciate the tree in front of your balcony or the potted plant in your room. When you feel comfortable, increase the time. You will soon realize that 24X7 guide that you always have at your disposal. I often myself asking a question thats troubling me and then I wait in silence. Soon, I get an answer with uncanny clarity. Why wait to get introduced to something so powerful that can help us live a magnificent life, why wait at all? You can access it right here, right now!